Sunday, July 16, 2017

Time to Grow Up?

I was talking to a friend on Twitter today about writing goals and aspirations. He is working diligently on a screen play and obviously is very invested time-wise with his writing career. The subject of my second book came up and he very innocently asked if I had started it.

If Twitter had sound effects, a derisive snort would have accompanied my response that I not only had started it, but that it was done...and, truth be told, it's partially edited. Making this admission to him had an interesting effect on me. The first is that I realized that I have written two books. I've always dismissed the second book as not counting because I haven't yet published it. But, saying to my friend that the book is done and really not far away from being published... Well, I totally see myself in a different light. 

I think I may well be a writer.

Maybe not well-paid. Maybe not well-sold. But I did write two books. That's got to count for something.

And I've written short stories that have been published in minor publications, as well as written all the other short stories and poetry that I never tried to publish. Maybe I'm not like all the other "I've written novels since I was two and would die if I didn't write" people. But, maybe--just maybe--I really am a writer.

The second effect was that I thought, "What the hell is wrong with me that I'm not just finishing and publishing the damn thing!" It's been five years--Five years!!--since I started writing the thing and I just keep dragging my feet and ignoring the pleas coming from my laptop to finish the little darling and set it free.




I know I've mentioned this curious procrastination here before. This reluctance (inability?) to get unstuck truly boggles my mind. I have a sneaky suspicion that anxiety is involved somehow. I'll go to write or to edit--I'll WANT to write or edit--and then the What-If's creep in (what if it sucks, what if I suck, etc...) and I just don't.




Yesterday my family and I went to Lincoln for one of the concerts of the Meadowlark Music Festival (Saxophonist Marco Albonetti with percussionist Dane Richeson). Before the concert we went to Barnes and Noble and I went back to the Writing section--a little reluctantly, believe it or not. 
Sitting on the shelf was a book called Fearless Writing by William Kenower. I'm not saying this book is going to be the savior of my procrastinating self. Last night, though, I read through the introduction and feel better because if someone wrote a book about "how to create boldly and write with confidence" then it's not just me with this problem.

Do I feel silly? Yes. Part of me is rolling my eyes at the part that is reading a writer's self-help book. But, I want to write. I want to finish my story, I want to figure this out.



Have you heard of the book Fearless Writing? Does fearless writing come naturally to you? 

Friday, July 07, 2017

Funny Friday Photos: Cute Squirrels, Dead Ducks and Delusional Deer.

Happy Weekend!

Things I learned over the last two weeks:

1. I better write posts on Friday nights, because if I wait until Saturday it won't be written.

2. How I define creativity needs adjusting. The first week of living an artist's life was fun, but I found that viewing creativity as an end product (ie. something I could see or read) was incredibly limiting. I did find that I was eager to be creative each day, so even just in a week my motivation improved. But lack of tangible "product" ideas made me stop the second week. I've decided that I'm going to commit to another week of daily creativity, but it's going to be writing focused. I think I'll include editing as an acceptable creative act, as well. Even though it's not new writing, I figure you have to use creativity to fix old writing.

3. My thirteen-year-old Visla is a bird killing machine. When she was a couple of years old she caught approximately five birds out of the air one summer. This summer she's killed two birds so far - a robin and a baby barn swallow. My children are horrified with her bird killing ways, but I explain to them she can't help her instincts. She would have been the best hunting dog, if we did that kind of thing. I still feel bad about the baby bird, though. She didn't crush it outright, so it was still living when she gave it to me, and it died in my hands. :(

Well, now I need some funny photos! Are you ready? Let's go!








It's expression in the bottom picture is exactly how excited I get when I catch a new Pokemon in Pokemon Go!






Yes,  I know this is an elk, but did you know that elk are one of the largest animals in the deer family? So I wasn't wrong when I called it a deer in the title. Yes, I actually worried over that and looked it up.




Pun!



I don't really have a favorite this week. I think they're all kind of cute.

Have a lovely weekend!

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